sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i will never coherently bang her
no. you can't hotbox the world.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
