we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
