you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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