your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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