White coat. Heels.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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