just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Dick very happy bro
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
