That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize