all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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