Kiss
Puke
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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