R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
