Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
