you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
