So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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