what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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