You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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