ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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