went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize