i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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