I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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