btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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