spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Bring me that man meat
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
