dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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