how can u be prego again
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
