I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize