her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Randomize
