whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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