so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
