yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
