What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
