so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I have fence marks all over my body
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
