why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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