put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
