Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
