She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
This gyro tastes like lonliness
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
