return my video game
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
