she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
