Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
People with herpes should wear stickers.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I understand Curling. That high.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
