Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
