i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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