i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I need help removing her.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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