not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize