It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
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