it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
