Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize