Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize