Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
