it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
