Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
