I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize