im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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