Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
